My mother didn’t
love to cook, but there were a few things she made that we all looked forward
to. Her hamburg pie, of course. And apple pie (although I don’t love apple pie
from anyone’s kitchen). Fried haddock and fries. When I was young she also made
bread. Teacakes – little circles of bread a bit smaller than your typical
hamburger roll, brushed with butter on the top before going into the oven. One
time, she showed me how to make them, let me help form the rolls. There seemed
a special technique I just couldn’t get, but really it was just a matter of
stretching the dough and patting it back together into a little cake. Mom
wrapped her hand around each one as it was placed on the pan and smushed it
together a bit more. A final hug. Even before they went into the oven, the
smell was intoxicating. “The best way to eat a tea cake,” she told me, “is
right out of the oven, with a bit of butter and a cup of tea. I’ll call you
when they’re done.” She didn’t need to call me. I stayed close by, breathing in
the toasted yeasty smell. We sat at the table together, and had “tea” even
though it was too early for an official British teatime. She sipped her tea and
me my milk and we oohed and aahed over the delicious bread. And we were both so
ridiculously happy to be sitting there you would have thought it a great
holiday. I don’t know what day it was. I don’t know why I was home alone with
her. But my taste buds can remember the buttery teacakes still.
Disorganized, disjointed, and sometimes completely lost, but finding my way through writing.
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Monday, November 11, 2013
Nana - Thankful Day 11
I was in Junior
High when Nana died, the first major loss I had to face. Someone whose hand I
had held, whose check I kissed had ceased to exist. I remember being at a loss
as to how to react. Was I supposed to cry? I felt like I should but I almost
had to force it because really I was in shock, numb. I knew that my Grampas had
died before that but I had never known
them, never held their hands or kissed their checks. I never expected Nana to
die.
Nana died 32
years ago today.
Sunday, November 10, 2013
for peanut butter crackers - Thankful day 10
In my memory, I’m
in Nana’s kitchen. There’s a feeling of clutter around me; not mess, just stuff
everywhere ready to be picked up and used as needed, a project or two left in
the middle to attend to other things. Just then she was attending to my hunger
and fixing a snack; a dollop of peanut butter in the middle of a Hi Ho cracker
(Ritz crackers being a bit too pricey). As she handed me the cracker, she
explained the proper way to eat it. “Nibble around the edges where there is no
peanut butter, then pop that last bit into your mouth. Delicious.” And it was.
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
so much to do - Thankful Day 6
I am thankful for
the full schedule that has kept me from posting for the last few days. While I
might sometimes complain (OK, I complain a lot!) about the amount there is to
do, when I ended my work day today I felt good about all I have accomplished. I
work with some pretty amazing colleagues who push me to be better every day. I
am challenged in two classes I’m taking this semester and the work I’m doing
there has already improved my work at school. I have two active daughters
involved in theater, soccer, Destination Imagination, and National History Day
so my week is always broken up by their schedules. While I don’t exactly thrive
under pressure, I do work better with a list of things to do. When I don’t have
a lot on my list, I actually slack off more.
The best part of
all? No matter how much time I spend
planning lessons, reviewing the latest research, cooking supper, doing laundry,
and driving all over town, I end each night beside the man of my dreams.
Yeah. Thank you.
Monday, November 4, 2013
My baby girl - Thankful Day 3
My plan today was
to write how very grateful I am for my baby girl who turned 13 today. Life with
her has had its ups and downs and I am truly thankful for the ride.
While I was doing
dishes, my husband came up behind me and said, something like this: “13 years
ago you had a tough day. A lot of pain. But look what resulted. Thank you.” And
I realized how important it is to express gratitude to each other.
Grateful for my
beautiful family.
Sunday, November 3, 2013
asiago bagels (Thankful, day 2)
So, when I
mentioned the Thankful Challenge to my daughter while we were getting a quick
bite at Panera yesterday she said, “You should write that you are thankful for
asiago bagels.” And at that moment, I truly was. She had gone out to breakfast
with her dad earlier, but I stayed home to do a few chores. As soon as she got
home, we ran out to shop for a few things last minute birthday gifts for her
sister. In the rush of the morning, I forgot to eat breakfast but once settled
in the car, my hunger surfaced. We went to one store and then detoured across
the parking lot for a bagel (and a smoothie for her) and with that sustenance,
I was able to finish the rest of our errands.
Yes, on November 2
I was grateful for that bagel but really for so much more. For the financial
security that allowed us to be out on this gift buying errand and to stop for a
bite. For the freedom of movement and choice. For the joy of being with a
teenage daughter who wanted to be there and engaged me in conversation for our
entire time together and thoughtfully picked out gifts for her little sister.
And if it hadn’t been for that bagel, and that comment, and this challenge, I
might never have noticed.
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