I’m in the parlor, listening to the news stream through my
laptop, descriptions of the grief and fear from yesterday’s bombing. I can hear
my girls in the family room waking up with giggles after their sleepover with a
friend. It is not so incongruous.
In the past year, I have reflected a lot on the phrase life goes on. In the midst of chaos and
sorrow and bad things happening there are always children giggling, moments of
joy.
I don’t believe that “God gives us only what we can handle”;
I don’t believe that “everything happens for a reason”. What I believe is that
yucky, crappy things happen and so do great and wonderful things. And that’s
life.
I also believe that our daily decisions about how to react
make a difference. Before I knew to turn on the news yesterday, I was already
thinking about how to make my classroom a more peaceful place. I have made
mistakes and I want to stop making them. I have gone through whole days without
reflecting on my contribution to the conflict. One goal for my week-long break
was to reflect on my behavior and my reactions to behavior and see how I could
do better. That goal gained urgency at 3pm yesterday.
This school year has included way too much tragedy and I
want desperately to blame someone and make them reform. What I have to do is
much harder. No blame, just thoughtfulness in all my actions. Not easy. But, in
the name of first graders in Connecticut and cheering spectators in Boston I
will try.
Thoughtfulness in all of our actions. It is a tall order but one worth achieving.
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